Choosing an egg donor or surrogacy agency to assist you in becoming a parent is one of the most important decisions you will make if you are a queer parent or gay couple looking to start a family. According to the American Fertility Association, you should ask the following questions of a surrogacy agency before you begin working with them as a gay couple:
- In what year was your agency established?
- Do you offer both egg donation and surrogacy?
- What is your success rate?
- Are you a member of the American Society for Reproductive Medicine?
- What percentage of your clients are gay?
- Are your reproductive attorneys knowledgeable about the laws dictating surrogacy and egg donor arrangements in my state of residence, as well as in the states of residence of my surrogate and egg donor? What about laws specific to LGBT persons?
- What extra legal steps, if any, need to be taken by my partner or by myself once our baby is born?
- How do we become matched with a surrogate?
- How do we become matched with an egg donor?
- Will we have a surrogacy contract and a reproductive attorney available to represent us? Does my partner need his own reproductive attorney? What about our surrogate and donor? Do they require separate legal counsel?
- How will changing laws about marriage and surrogacy arrangements affect us or our child(ren) in the future?
- What medical tests will I need to have done prior to giving a sperm sample?
- Can sperm samples from both my partner and myself be combined? How is this accomplished? Does this always result in a multiple birth?
- How can we assure the health and wellbeing of both our gestational carrier and our egg donor throughout this process?
There is also good news for intended dads who are HIV positive.
A new sperm washing and testing process now makes fatherhood possible. If either one or both male partners is HIV positive, call The AFA helpline at 888-917-3777 for a list of donor or surrogacy agencies and IVFCenters who will be happy to work with you.
Source: Building the Family of Our Dreams: A Primer for the LGBT Community Handbook provided by the American Fertility Association.
It’s Conceivable is pleased to provide the above information from The American Fertility Association. Their website has a wealth of resources for GLBTQ parents, including fact sheets, articles and FAQs.